My Problems with Anger

As strange as it is to write, it takes a lot to get me angry. I can get worked up, I can get testy, but actually angry. That takes a lot. When I do get angry I have a hard time dealing with it. I tend to snap at a person close to me, which is regrettable and something I always try to avoid. Usually it's a parent whom, after asking multiple times to not question me, I'll continued to be questioned and eventually snap. Other times I'll hit a wall, a door, something. NEVER a person and never a loved one. I can pride myself on saying I've a handle on my temper enough to know that I would never hurt anyone when it comes to actually losing it. In fact it's friends who are able to bring me back when I do lose it and when I'm alone that I'm at my most volatile, so if anything I'm more a danger to myself in that regard, but that's painting a picture that's far worse than I intend.

I take pride in everything I do, no matter how small or unimportant it might seem to other people, if I have a job to do, that job will be the most important thing in the world to me while I work at it. Mine own job, my place of work, the hours that I'm there, I work hard. I get everything finished that I'm supposed to, I'm polite and helpful and I'll always meet my targets. So far as I know I've never had a complaint made against me and if I have, I've never been told about it and by company policy I should have been. I take pride in my store sections and always make sure they're stocked, in order and have the correct boards.

So it annoys me. No, it FUCKS me off, when I will help out, do favours and then get treated like a piece of shit. I can take coming in on a midnight launch for the 3DS and then being given 6 jobs while my other colleague stands in the doorway chatting to a security guard, I can take being ignored, being told to do three things (none of which allow me to make boards for my section) and then when the big boss comes around and wants to know why there aren't boards where they're supposed to be, instead of standing up and saying "because I told him to put stock out" he will turn around and want to know why there are no boards there. I can take a someone brown nosing the big boss and undermining me and my hard work, but then, when I have no complaints, just because he's in a mood and has nothing to do, deciding to tell me how I should speak to FUCKING CUSTOMERS. I draw the line.

I'm not a vet of customer service, but I've worked in supermarkets and retail for over 10 years and while that certainly doesn't make me a vet of the trade, again, as far as I'm aware I've never had a complaint. I've never been pulled aside and told a customer has made a complaint for how rude I have been. All I saw today was a bored man with nothing better to do deciding that after 2 years of working for him, NOW he has a problem with the way I greet customers. I was insulted and fucked off. Especially when this same man who harps on about customer service came to the tills moments later, saw a huge queue, saw me serving on my own and then walked off because he "had to go home" and yet 15 minutes later he's downstairs putting out stock. Don't bull shit me, you didn't want to serve. You're so concerned with lassoing your staff under your control freak attitude you can't be bothered to do it yourself.

You're fine leaving 4 people to man a store when you're not in, but then when you're in and understaffed suddenly OOOO YOU MUST WORK. BULL SHIT! WE HAVE TO MAKE THE STORE LOOK PERFECT SO THE REGIONAL MANAGER CAN COME DOWN AND SEE HOW WONDERFUL IT IS, HOW FAKE IT LOOKS BECAUSE I'VE GOT YOU DOING STUPID HOURS BECAUSE I'M SCARED SHITLESS OF HIM. Not that we need staff is it. Staff keep leaving and no one wonders why?

One minute we're allowed NOTHING under the sections and EVERYTHING needs to go upstairs and now EVERYTHING needs to come back down. Of course it's the fucking lackeys who have to do it and in 6 months time it will all go back upstairs again and the lackeys will have to do that too. Instead of letting the people who have a hand on the button and know what they're FUCKING DOING call the shots, you immediately bow to any stupid request without questioning it due to your lack of back bone. When it's time for the stock to go upstairs again we should turn around and tell you to do it your fucking self, but we won't because we want to keep our jobs. I have no problem being told when I'm in the wrong but I can't stand fucking double standards and we want you to be yourselves and not work to a script but GOD FOR BID YOU do something like greet a customer in a different way from the standard.

FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!!

This has been my only form vent and I know, looking at it, it seems petty (and in retrospect it is) but I'm tired, I'm pissed off and save putting my head through a wall this is my only form of rant that I can do without pulling some poor (or in some cases well deserved) guys head off.